My Blog Challenge

Here at the college we have something called a Wellness Committee. Each month the Wellness Committee sponsors a Wellness Challenge where teams compete to win prizes for successful completion of said challenges.

I have yet to win. However, I am determined to complete March’s challenge…which is to eat 5 servings of fruits and vegetables a day for the entire month. I really think I can do it, and it sure would be nice to win for once.

However, to give myself further incentive I am passing along this challenge to you, my blog audience. Here’s how it works. Sign-up by March 1^st (just let me know if you want to give it a try) and on April 1^st here’s what will happen:

If you kept the challenge, and I also kept the challenge, I will send you a prize!

If you kept the challenge, but I did not, I will send you an even better prize!!

If you failed to keep the challenge, and I kept the challenge, you get to send me a prize (optional).

If you and I both failed to keep the challenge no one gets any prizes and we can both hang our heads in shame.

Now doesn’t that sound like fun!

(Not the hanging our heads in shame part, but the getting prizes part.)

“Wanna know what you’re playing for?”

I’ve no idea.

Prizes will be determined by who I’m sending them to and how enthusiastically they participated in my first ever BLOG CHALLENGE.

So, let me know if you want to play and then take a trip to your local grocery store to stock up on some sweat and healthy produce. Bon appetit!

Note: Here are the serving sizes for fruits and vegetables that I will accept:

Fruits – One Serving Equals…

· one banana , apple, peach, pear, orange or other similar sized fruit

· six strawberries

· two plums

· fifteen grapes

· 1/2 cup of chopped, cooked, or canned fruit

· 1⁄2 a grapefruit or avocado

· one large slice of melon or fresh pineapple

· one heaped tablespoons of raisins

· 5 dried apricots

· 7 large black olives (warning – black olives are high in sodium)

· 1/2 cup of orange or other 100% fruit juice (unsweetened)

Vegetables– One Serving Equals…

· five broccoli florets

· ten baby carrots

· one roma tomato

· 1/2 cup cooked vegetables or beans

· 1/2 cup tomato juice

· 1/2 lg. baked potato

· one ear of corn

· one heaped salad bowl of torn lettuce or raw spinach

· three cups popped popcorn

My Mam Story

This week I have a rather anticlimactic story to tell. But it does end with a moral, so I hope you’ll read it. It’s about my mammogram. (Okay. If you’re a guy you don’t have to read it.)

I had my first mammogram about 10 years ago. I was rather young to be getting mammograms, but I felt a lump once, and although it turned out to be nothing (as most lumps do) the doctor felt I should get mammograms yearly after that. So, being the good little patient that I am, I obey my doctor’s orders and get smooshed 4 times a year, 2 smooshes per boob.

The first couple of years mammograms didn’t bother me much at all. Sure, they were a little embarrassing, but the lady who did them in Sleepy Eye was so super nice and gentle I didn’t mind at all. Then we moved to New Ulm. That’s when I started disliking, and eventually hating mammograms.

The first thing that bothered me was the waiting. You check in at one desk, wait for them to call your name, go down a long hallway to a changing room, change into the smock they provide, and sit and wait again for them to come get you. I’m not a very good waiter, and it all seemed rather unnecessary.

The next thing I didn’t like is the way the techs in New Ulm smoosh you in one swift move. Not little by little like the sweet lady in Sleepy Eye. The first time I had it done like that it sucked the breathe right out of me and scared me half to death. Each year after that I hoped it would be different, but it never was. I left disgusted every time.

Perhaps you’re wondering why I didn’t say anything. I thought about it. I composed several letters in my head, but none of them ever got sent. I guess I’m not a complainer. Well, not to strangers anyway. And really, there wasn’t much to complain about. I just missed the sweet lady in Sleepy Eye and her gentle ways. Sure my little yearly smooshing had turned into borderline torture, but I’m not a baby. I can take it.

Then came 2010 – the worst year yet. Squeeze here, squeeze there…and on the fourth squeeze, I was sure they pinched me. I mean it hurt! I probably should have said something then, but I just wanted to get out of there. So as soon as she gave me the go ahead, I put my shirt back on and headed home, ready to put the entire experience behind me for one more year.

Unfortunately, a few days later I got a call. The radiologist saw something and I needed to come back for a retest.

A few days later I dragged myself back, pasted a smile on my face, and got squeezed a couple more times. Then more waiting (erg), and finally a lady came and sat down beside me to tell me the good news. There’s no reason for concern. What they saw on the first mammogram was “skin on skin.” (Yeah. I knew that. They pinched me!) So, I smiled and thanked them and walked home, grumbling to myself the entire way.

But my ordeal wasn’t over. A few weeks later the bill arrived. They billed us for the second mammogram; $411.00! I called and complained, but to no avail. Insurance only covers one mammography a year. Additional tests are the responsibility of the insured. This last turn of events unnerved me. $411.00 to be pinched.

Fast forward to last month. I had my yearly check up as usual, and, as usual, the doctor ordered a mammogram for me. I tried to talk him out of it, but he would have none of that. So I smiled and made my appointment like a good little patient. A few days before my scheduled torture session I was telling my story to a few friends. They gave me this advice: “You should say something.”

They were right. It was time to say something; not to friends and family, but to the person doing the mammogram. I wasn’t looking forward to it. I was afraid if I complained they’d think I was a ___ (you know, the “B” word) and smoosh me even faster! It could happen. To be completely honest, I was afraid to be anything other than nice. But maybe if I could put it nicely…

For the next several days I rehearsed my speech. But no matter how sweet I started, by the end I always ended up shouting: “…and they billed us for the second mammogram!”

Well, here’s where my story gets pretty boring. The day of my appointment I checked in, waited for only a minute or two, was taken directly to the room where the mammograms are done (they don’t take you to that second room anymore I was told), changed behind a curtain, said a quick prayer, told the tech my story in unexpected politeness, got my 4 smooshes done nice and gentle, was thanked by the tech for telling her about my concerns, and went home.

End of story.

Well, almost the end. A few days later I got my letter, “Dear Ms. Scharlemann: We are pleased to inform you that the result of your recent breast examination is normal/benign (not cancer), “ Yada, yada, yada.

The moral of the story: Voice your concern to those it concerns, all other complaints are folly.

THE END

Walls, Boulders, and Wings

Oprah Winfrey has a column in her magazine she calls, “What I Know For Sure,” where she asks successful people to share their wisdom by completing that sentence. If I were ever considered a successful person by the editors at “O” and were asked to complete that sentence I think I’d say something like this:

What I know for sure is that we do not walk through this life alone. There is a wise and loving God who is ready, willing and able to show us his good pleasing and perfect will for our lives.

Do those words sound familiar? They come from one of my favorite chapters of the Bible, Romans 12.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

It’s taken me a while, but I think I’ve figured how to do that... how to test and approve what God’s will is. I use a method I like to call walls, boulders and wings.

Walls – I have a very active imagination. Ideas are forever popping up in my head. So when an idea comes to me I generally go for it. But sometimes my ideas are not in line with God’s plan for me. And God shows me this by putting a wall in my way. Here’s an example. A few years back I was thinking of joining a choir that meets in Mankato. I went to one of their concerts, talked to the director, and was all set to try out. Then I found out they rehearse on Tuesday nights. Tuesday nights we have hand-bell practice. That was a wall for me. Sure, I was a bit disappointed, but not too much. I figured it was God’s way of showing me he didn’t really want me to be in that choir after all, and I was okay with that. Who am I to question God’s will?

Boulders – Boulders may look a bit like walls when you first come to them, but there are ways to get around (or climb over, or dig under, or drill through) a boulder. For lack of a better example, let me tell you what we had for lunch yesterday. I was going to make barbecued chicken and fries. I preheated the oven and threw in some frozen french fries. Then I took a couple of boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut them into bite-sized pieces, and fried them up. When it came time to add the barbeque sauce, I hit a boulder. We were out. Hummm. Now what? Well, I used to make a stir fry with chicken and green peppers that was pretty good. I had a few green peppers in the fridge, so I chopped some up and threw them in the pan. But my old stir fry recipe was never all that exciting. I wondered if a little teriyaki sauce might be nice. It was worth a try. Just as I was about to put that in, I remembered what Sara Evers once told me about corn starch; that it helps make a gravy in stir fries. Even though I had a box of corn starch in the cupboard for years, I’d never once used it for cooking. (I only got it to make oobleck. The video at the end of this blog will show you what oobleck is.) So I sprinkled a little corn starch in the pan, and then added the teriyaki. By the time the fries were done I had created a brand new dish that even my 16-yr. old son declared was “pretty good,” high praise coming from him. The meal was a hit, and it was only because of those boulders which sent me in a new and unexpected direction. To God be the Glory!

Wings – If you’ve ever ended up in a good place without really knowing how you got there, that’s the way it is when God picks you up in his wings and carries you. Things just sort of happen the way they were supposed to happen. You might hear something on the radio that gets you thinking, or bump into someone who tells you something that plants a seed in your head. The ways and means God uses are beyond my comprehension, but what God ordains always happens, and it’s always good.

As active as my imagination is, it’s no match for God’s will. The Bible describes God as being able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine. Immeasurably more! What an exciting road we are on. So don’t get down when you stub your toe on that boulder. Figure out how to get around it. And if that boulder turns out to be a wall, rejoice! God’s will is being revealed to you. His good, pleasing, and perfect will.

ONE VERY IMPORTANT ADDITIONAL NOTE: I can’t write a blog (or an article for “O” magazine) about the way God guides us through life without mentioning two critical components: faith and prayer. My walls, boulders, and wings method will only work if you know without a doubt that you have a Lord and Savior, and look to His Word as your number one authority on who he is and where he’ll take you. Secondly, enjoying frequent, if not constant dialog with your Lord through prayer is essential to following God’s will for your life. What a privilege to say “Thy will be done,” and know that it will!

And now, a cute little video about corn starch suspension, also known as "oobleck."

My Favorite Things - A Quiz

I like certain things simply because they’re fun to say. See if you can guess my favorite things in each of the following seven categories:

My favorite Pet Store:

1. Pets “R” Us

2. PetSmart

3. Pet Expo

My favorite Minnesota County:

1. Isanti

2. Kandiyohi

3. Watonwan

My favorite Greek Goddess:

1. Aphrodite

2. Penelope

3. Persephone

My favorite Cloud:

1. Stratus

2. Cirrus

3. Cumulo-nimbus

My favorite Digemon:

1. Agumon

2. Gabumon

3. Kabuterimon

My favorite Bones:

1. Fibulas

2. Phalanges

3. Tarsals

My favorite Spanish Words:

1. Cada día

2. Que pasa

3. De nada

ANSWERS

My favorite Pet Store:

Pet Expo – Say it a few times…it’s fun!

My favorite Minnesota County:

Kandiyohi – Pronounced Candy-Yo-Hi! With the accent on Yo!

My favorite Greek Goddess:

It’s a close one, but the winner is…Aphrodite

My favorite Cloud:

Cumulo-nimbus, of course. Isn’t everyone’s?

My favorite Digemon:

Kabuterimon – but you have to shout when you say it. KABUTERIMON!

My favorite bones:

The phalanges. They’re the bones in the tips of your fingers and toes.

My favorite Spanish Saying:

Everything sounds good in Spanish, but I’ve always liked Cada día. It means each day.

And now, a gift to my sister Becky, and my two daughters Amanda and Danica who all have birthdays tomorrow, Feb. 7^th.

Happy Birthday, Girls!